Life @ Work Series - Discontentment But with Whom? [1]
Our Life @ Work Undergoes Various Stages Of Contentment. Our contentment with work is interwoven with our contentment with self. In the early stages of discontentment, this is not easy to see. Our first response can be one of blaming the organisation for its perceived shortcomings. This is a mistake for no amount of change in the attitude of the organisation, will salve the discontent that resides in you. The prompt for the issue may be ameliorated but ultimately the issue is deeper than our work place. When we feel discontented with our work, we are bumping up against that word ‘judgement’. We need to ask ourselves ‘who are we judging’ and who is ‘responsible’ for our feelings about our experiences at work?
Our experiences and the parts other people play is not the most easily digestible truth. I know for I have faced many unpalatable truths about ‘what is’. Its gut wrenching. ‘What is’ requires careful consideration for a fundamental shift in perspective is necessary to successfully resolve situations affecting you and involving others. The shift revolves around our definition of ‘personal responsibility’. In a world which increasingly abdicates responsibility, the concept of being responsible for all that occurs to us, is more than a tad difficult to accept.
When we accept the premise that we are responsible for our experiences, we soon realise that expecting someone else to change or sort out ‘your work issue’ does not make sense. And it does not altogether serve you. For the most part, one is handing over control of ‘your issue, and or your ideals’ to another, a strategy that leaves you waiting in abeyance. What is achievable and sustainable is what you personally have control over - your self, your responses, and the actions that flow naturally when decisions are made from a place of ownership. Such that when we find ourselves blaming or criticising the organisation we are working in, its time to pause. To pause and re-access what occurred with a view to seeing things in a different light - once the angst has passed. Decisions made in angst moments do no one any good, lest of all yourself.
Having a process for working through your issues is not something many are aware of. I call it self-work. Sure we get there in the end, process or not. However it can take years bringing about change in terms of our place of work. Always the money thing arises. Money is the bait that keeps one trapped in the treadmill of life at work - a trap of your own choosing. For when we focus on the outer world, we are focusing on a problem, not the solution. Ones inner world is where our solutions are to be found. The beginnings of contemplating your discontentment with your role, are indications that you are being presented with a ‘test’. A test of your character. To either rise up and meet the challenge of the particular situation by overcoming self, or stepping out of the role altogether. It’s courageous stuff the overcoming of self and following your heart. Your heart of course is speaking your truth.
Meanwhile the result of feeling discontentment may result in the withdrawal of ones 'heart' from the work that you do. When making this choice, one tends to go through the motions and life at work becomes boring. Change comes about in the moment you decide to step out of discontentment and examine the underlying reason for your feelings.
Journalling is a process of active involvement with your particular issue where one explores through writing what occurred, thereby releasing the energy held in your thoughts thus your being. Writing leads to a deeper exploration of self where one naturally unpacks ones feelings and therefore distill the essence of any situation. What lies underneath the feelings of discontentment, as all coaches know, is not what is top of mind. Hence, keep writing in your journal. Naming is very powerful for until we name what occurred or is occurring, we cannot fathom what to do about it. And taking action no matter how small is how we resolve all that comes to greet us.
Such that our discontentment with life at work could be a blessing in disguise, if one pauses to consider what your emotions are trying to teach you. Is it the organisation that is in need of change or is it yourself that is calling for change within oneself? What do you have control over? I posit that taking responsibility for yourself and doing the necessary self-work leads to one becoming stronger, and wiser for it. As WE change so to do our circumstances. Maybe the organisation is not the source of the issue after all. Maybe it's a call to define your values. Maybe, just maybe, our work life experiences are a call to each of us, to bring our authentic selves into being. Ponder that and see what resonates with you.
Date: 18 March 2020
Authoress: Carol Lorraine
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